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Consider this quote from Abe Lincoln

"America will never be destroyed from the outside. If we falter and lose our freedoms, it will be because we destroyed ourselves."

 

 

We’ve just about made it through the month of May and although the weather feels more like early July we have a few things to accomplish before we hit summer full bore. One of my favorite times of the year is upon us, and it isn’t just because the children are now out of school. No, we turn our thoughts to my favorite holiday, Memorial Day.

Certainly for some of you, it’s a good excuse to go camping, or lay around the yard in your swimming trunks or perhaps even a few of you just enjoy having the day off of work. But let us not loose sight of the true meaning of Memorial Day. It is a day for us to honor those who have come before us, both to give us freedom and to give us life.

All across the state in cemeteries big and small, people will gather to pay tribute to the dead. I hope that whatever you choose to do this weekend, you take a little time out to visit a local cemetery and honor those who sacrificed for us. In the interest of the request of your time, I feel like it is a good time to go over some basic cemetery etiquette so we are all on the same page.

  1. Remember you are walking in a cemetery. It is hallowed ground. Be respectful to those around you both living and dead.

  2. When moving around a cemetery, remember to walk between the stones from row to row. When at all possible, refrain from walking across a grave. This is referred to as “Grave Waking” and is seen as a sign of disrespect by many people.

  3. Never use flour, or shaving cream to read a worn stone. This can damage many old stones that are already very delicate. The best way to accomplish this is to take a digital photo of the stone and on your computer edit the picture to a negative image. The details of the stone will be clear and crisp.

  4. Remember to keep voices down and children in check. Many who are visiting the cemetery just want quiet time with their thoughts. Also there are stones that may topple if they are crawled on which could injure or crush a child.

  5. Never use a stiff bristled brush or commercial cleaning solutions to clean headstones. Use a soft brush or just a rag and always use just plain water, which will keep stones from becoming damaged.

  6. NEVER remove an item left at a gravesite unless it is your item. Stones, coins, trinkets and flowers should be left alone. Dead flowers should be removed and placed in the proper compost site or in the dumpster.

  7. Do not approach a solitary person standing at a gravesite unless they acknowledge you or seem to be in serious distress. Many times overwhelming grief will bring someone to their knees at a gravesite. Unless they seem to be medically stricken, the proper thing is to keep and eye on them, but maintain your distance.

  8. Take care when driving on narrow cemetery paths and driveways. Stay on them and only park in the grass if there are no graves within twenty-five feet of your vehicle. Remember, that just because there is no headstone that a grave may not be present.

  9. It is a kind gesture to place flowers at a grave that has had no visitors. For many years I have adopted a few older graves in the cemeteries I visit and by doing so I am continuing the tradition of making sure they are never forgotten.

  10. Cemetery hours, unless posted, are generally thought to be dawn to dark. Do your best not to stay in a cemetery after dark. Not only is it in poor taste, we all know that is when the zombies are most active.

  11. If wind has blown flower arrangements from a grave, do your best to try to figure out where it belongs and return it, otherwise set it near the next closest stone.

  12. Report vandalism of any grave or headstone to the authorities immediately.

  13. Finally, remember that you are in a place that is sacred to both the residents and for those who loved them. Be respectful and courteous at all times and walk lightly.

See you next week…Remember, we’re all in this together.