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Consider this quote from Abe Lincoln

"America will never be destroyed from the outside. If we falter and lose our freedoms, it will be because we destroyed ourselves."



It only takes one look at me to know that I’m in harvest mode and burning the candle at both ends. After a fourteen hour day, the last thing I feel like doing is anything that requires the use of my brain, which in turn is fortunate for you, because that means another week with thoughts from the Front Porch.

I decided that I would use these week’s space as a public service announcement kind of column for those of you who are headed off to an adult party this week, or just like candy and can’t seem to be able to trust the people on your block not to take your kids and keep them. Seriously? Have you seen your kids lately? Who would take them? DO they know how much food they eat?

Having the perfect Halloween costume can be important in many respects, but one must be careful not to show up dressed the same as the other guests. You know that every female is going to be some sort of scantily clad something, although the one year that I dressed up as a “sexy lunch lady” I actually kind of grossed myself out. Finding the perfect costume takes time and imagination and sometimes just a little bit of luck. So for those of you that need a little help here are a few ideas that have been rolling around in my head.

  1. Dress up in your fanciest Sunday suit and go around taking money from people and then give it to someone who didn’t show up….you will be a Democrat.

  2. Take a white sheet and put some eye holes in it. At this point you have a few choices and depending on what you stick with it, you can be either a ghost or a marshmallow.

  3. Find some brown paper used to wrap packages for shipping and wrap it around yourself and go as the inside of the roll of toilet paper.

  4. Take kernels of corn and glue them to yourself and go as the Corn Palace.

  5. Wrap yourself in Christmas lights and then stand in the corner and plug yourself in and pretend you are the Christmas tree.

  6. Find a really old dress and go around talking other people’s drinks and pretend you’re a temperance movement founder.

  7. Finally you could just go as yourself, because I’m sure someone finds you spooky.

See you next week…remember, we’re all in this together.